WombleTown: Assorted, Unhelpful, Unholy Thoughts

 

Braindump of various (unholy) thoughts…….GO.

-- “Isnut Redux” will be over in under 3 hrs, with Isner winning, very likely, in straight sets. Meh.

-- Isnut aside, Fed’s draw looks like a snapshot from 2005.

-- Progress at an event being inversely proportional to points being defended....Berd goes out in week one. Perhaps even to Donald Young.


-- Murray just had his best FO ever. His Queens match against ARod was likely the best he’s ever played. Anywhere. Winning Queens in its entirety was, on the other hand, a clear case of not knowing when to stop, in the foulest of taste, and amounts to cashing in his chips too early. Just a feeling I can’t seem to dismiss.

-- Fernando Gonzalez in a GS draw: thine eyes doth not deceive thee

-- Federer/Nalbandian scheduled to meet in R3: thine eyes doth not deceive thee

-- New game: Pick a farce, any farce. Chances are AbFab’s already done it, or will find a way of doing it before the end of week one. Expect Milos to get very pissed off, which ought to be interesting as I’m not familiar with that phenomenon.

-- Point and laugh all you want, but I can totally see Rafa going down to Delpo (R4) or Berd (QF).

-- James Ward will continue his Union-Jack-coloured epiphany, and come close to knocking out Michael Llodra, before the latter remembers how great he is at coming through these early round, 5-set (late night) raves. Needless to say, he'll go out meekly in his next match.

-- “Pova is the favourite”. Playing her best post-shoulder-op tennis certainly, but favourite? [in my best, whiney call-waiting voice] “I’m sorry, I’m afraid I don’t know what that word means – please try again later…”


-- I’m looking for a strong run from Serena, but I don’t expect her to win it. It’s simply been too long and the health scare is not something she’s ever had to contend with. Venus represents the more intriguing choice…..

-- Can *just* about see Marion preventing Serena from reaching the quarters. Just. And she’ll need to be lucky.

-- Out of Tsvetana (SF), Kaia (QF) and Petra (SF) – last years result in brackets – only the latter has a chance of not being plunged into rankings free-fall come two weeks time. Which probably means the exact reverse will take place.

-- Incidentally, why is no one talking about Kaia Kanepi? All I’m saying is there’s a lot of hoopla surrounding, say, Tsvetana (who I like btw), who’s only won 4 matches in the 14 events she’s entered since Wimbledon last year.

-- Since the media have done a bout turn and are suddenly shitting on Caro as an early “flameout”, almost as forcibly as they plugged her in RG – I’m gonna put myself out there, and say that she’ll do “great things”. Only, there’s a small chance that most of them take place in the first week.

-- Make no mistake about it: by far the absolute worst thing that could happen next week, is for Li Na to exit the party early. All those euphoria-tinged RG epilogues on how she might now be ready to make good on her talent, will look like nothing more than romantic fallacies. I’ve seen it happen to better players. Of course it may not happen at all. Except it might.

-- Declare thy allegiance then (remembering to balance romance with actual credibility). Here’s mine: Murray, Sod, Fed, Nole (in that order)…..Marion, Pova, Venus, Li, Serena, Petra, Yools (in that order)…..GO.
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WombleTown: ‘In Search of Lost Break Points’ and other Proustian Endeavours (Epilogue)

 

 

» Longest match ever played (11 hrs 5 mins)

» Longest set ever played (8 hrs and 11 mins, itself longer than the previous longest match)

» Most games in a set (138)

» Most games in a match (183)

» Most aces served in a match by one player (Isner 112)

» Total aces served in a match (215 - Isner 112 + Mahut 103)

 

It will never be repeated again. Should it?

 

Andy Roddick bought and hand delivered a bucket of Italian food to John Isner last night.

 

I’m hoping a bunch of French players buckled down and did something similar for Mahut.

 

With their World Cup dream in tatters and their squad, by the sounds of it, in shambles, I’d say France could do with a hero right now. And they could do a lot worse than Nicolas Mahut,

 

I was backing Mahut if that’s not already obvious. Nothing against Izzy but I felt the height advantage and that of serving first meant the numbers were stacked against Nico from the get-go. Whenever that was.

 

I suspect only tennis nerds knew this match was even happening when it started out on court 18 a couple of days ago.

 

By the close of play yesterday, even Izzy’s fumes were running on fumes.

 

2 days, 11 hours and 16,000 calories later we have a result.

 

 

To those that say “it’s just not cricket”, or even tennis, for that matter, I say you’re absolutely right.

 

You may or may not believe in mandatory tie-breaks at 30 or even 50 all, but what we saw over the last couple of days transcends not just tennis, but sport itself.

Was there some bravado, just a little bit of machismo at play out there during the match do you think? Taking some pride in it’s length and perhaps wanting it continue? Probably.

 

Not that I care very much.

 

There really are no words to describe the mental resolve that sees you come out and hold serve 70 times.

 

And even less to describe the unadulterated guts that sees you play catch up 68 times.

 

 

At the conclusion of every game a deliciously poker-faced Mohammed Lahyani would read out the farcical scoreline. Never once did he lose control. Never once did it ever seem any less surreal. Like some Summer School workshop in Absurdist Humour.

 

What was perhaps more astonishing was that by the end of it, it was known as much for it’s shotmaking and net play as it was for those big serves.

 

You know your sport has broken new ground when it makes the main headlines, second only to England winning their crucial World Cup match.

 

Right in the thick of it yesterday, the soothing voice of Sue Barker could be heard assuring us that our “regular TV schedule would be restored at the conclusion of this match” (Good luck with that).

 

I couldn’t snap out of it. I didn’t snap out of it, choosing, or perhaps being chosen to, remain transfixed by this bizarre vision of tennis purgatory.

 

But normal service is indeed, now, being restored.

 

 

Whilst ‘Mahisner’ were thrashing it out on court 18, AbFab came through a five setter of his own next door on court 17.

 

The eyebrows still have it.

 

Now who or what will frame their fearful symmetry?

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WombleTown: ‘In Search of Lost Break Points’ and other Proustian Endeavours

 

 

 

The match that broke Wimbledon’s online scoreboard. No really (it still thinks it’s 8 all in the fourth)

 

The match that gave me a new found respect for Mohammed Lahyani’s sore bottom. No. Er. That came out wrong.

 

When they said “30 all” it wasn’t  points they were referring to, and when they said “40 all” it wasn’t deuce.

 

When Federer went down a set on Centre Court it didn’t seem to register.

 

When Dent served at 148mph - the fastest serve in Wimbledon history against Djokovic on Court 1, no one seemed to care.

 

I’ll stop talking in italics now, because I know how annoying I find it when others do. And because it looks like I’m whispering. Which I’m not.

 

I took a break from proceedings at 51-51 (sue me), and went out to watch the cricket at my local club. A civilised sport with designated start and end times.

 

 

On my way back I talked tennis with a complete stranger in the street. I told him it was 51 all in the fifth. He punched me in the face. Before calling the police.

 

Mahut had completed a 24-22 win over Alex Bogdanovic in qualifying and another five setter in the main draw just to reach this point. Yet still somehow managed to look the fresher of the two.

 

Both superhuman and inhumane in it’s endurance, or one HELL of a poker face.

 

He was also serving second and thus playing catch up for the entire set, yet still managed to ratchet up only four less aces than his taller opponent despite not possessing half his serve.

 

Mahut: He's [Isner] just a champ....crowd are amazing...."

 

Isner: “Nothing like this will happen again. Ever”

 

Djokovic: Maybe they should have agreed to play a tie-break at 50-all!"

 

Federer: "I love this! I don't know if I was crying or laughing. It was too much."

-- BBC

 

As heroic as it all was, should it really have gone on so long?

 

There were those suggesting it wouldn’t have gone on for half, quarter, or even an eighth of the time it did had a Naderer or even a Muzzard or Djoko been on the other side of the net.

 

Heroic Endurance or simply a haemorrhaging break point conversion rate?

 

Next time can we flip a coin or something?

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